Friday, September 12, 2014

Be a Nice Bride: Be Good to Your Family

Family.  We all have some form of family surrounding us, supporting us, and sometimes making our lives twice as difficult as it needs to be.  That may not sound sweet and sugar-coated....but it's the truth of it.  Families can be a wonderful thing and they can also make things very messy.  As someone who deals with her fair share of family drama, I get it.  It just is what it is.

And when you're engaged, the last thing you want to have to deal with is how your dear sweet mother can't stand to be around Aunt Jojo.  Or how your older sister is a teeny bit bitter that she's not the one getting married.  Or how your great grandfather tends to be a little heavy on the whiskey.  All you want during this big important stage of your life is for your family to act "normal" for a keep from embarrassing you, to try to get along with each other, and to put on a good face for the in-laws.  And that's TOTALLY fair. the end of the day, they are your family.

They are the ones that have always, and WILL always be there for you.  They're the ones that loved you through your super awkward phase {even if they do continue to bring out those awful pictures every chance they get}.  They are the ones that want nothing more than for you to be happy with the man of your dreams.  And chances are, they are SO THRILLED to be included in your big day. are just a few ways you can make sure to let your family know that you appreciate their love and support....and to try and maintain your sanity in the process.

- Choose your battles.  I know how that sounds.  And I know that the idea of agreeing to something that isn't your first choice for YOUR big day probably makes your stomach turn.  But here's the reality of the situation: it's one day.  And if your mother is absolutely positively insisting that she be allowed to invite her crazy best friend from high school that you haven't seen since you were 6....allow it.  If it's not going to completely and totally ruin your entire day and it's going to make your mother happy....just go with it.  Allowing her this one thing is going to save you a lot of arguments, headaches, and bottles of wine down the road.  I'm not saying you should give in to every demand that every family member makes.  But again, choose your battles.  Only fight the ones that are really worth the energy.  You'll be needing all the energy you can muster during this process.

- Thank them.  This sounds simple.  And sort of like common sense.  But a lot of times, the effort of family members goes unnoticed.  Because, after all, they're family.  So they would do it all for you regardless, right?  Well....that may be so.  But it doesn't mean that they don't deserve a hug and maybe a cup of coffee...and genuine "thank you".  Those two words go so far.  So, when your sister stays up till 3am on a work night helping you put together programs and your mom runs tons of last minute errands that you just forgot about and your dad has calluses on all of his fingers from making those flower boxes you just had to have....Just thank them.  And you'll see that, when they feel appreciated, they'll all get along so much better with each other...and with you.

- Don't forget....your fiance has a family too!  You're not alone in this.  Everyone has a crazy family.  Seriously.  So....while you're freaking out about how your family is going to act leading up to and at your wedding, just try to remember that your fiance is probably doing the same.  And you can both probably rest assured that your crazy aunts will end up dancing on the tables TOGETHER and neither one of you will be more responsible than the other for bringing the crazies to the wedding.

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